Have you ever found yourself saying ” I didn’t have time”? If so, what do you think you were really saying?

The reason I bring this up is because I didn’t do a post yesterday and when we were going to bed my husband asked, “have you done your blog?” I answered with a simple, “No.” I could easily have said, ‘I didn’t have time’ but if I had, I wouldn’t have been being honest with myself.

I didn’t do my blog because I didn’t want to, I didn’t have a very good day yesterday, I don’t mean in what I did, in fact that was awesome. I met up with a dear friend who I haven’t seen for ages and had lunch with her and my 3 kids and then I went out for supper to celebrate my daughter’s home coming (after 6 weeks traveling)  and her birthday. So why on earth did I not have a good day? Mental health doesn’t work that way, just because you are doing great things doesn’t mean you are having a great time. I will discuss this more in another post because I really wanted to talk about ‘time’ in this one.

Not having enough time, is such an interesting concept, we seem to go through life being so busy and yet we don’t have time to do so many things that we want or theoretically need to do. So, again, I ask you, when you find yourself saying “I didn’t have time” what do you think you are really saying? Is it like me and you didn’t want to, or was it you were afraid to, or maybe you were embarrassed to, or felt pressured to…The list is endless but each one is more likely to be the accurate answer and not the fact you didn’t have time.

When you allocate time to think about why you didn’t have any, it’s amazing what comes to the surface and ok, you may not want it to, which is precisely why you disguised it in the first place but nonetheless it’s an incredibly good insight into what you are not doing, feeling, addressing etc

What are you hiding from and why? If you really want to do something you find the time don’t you, I mean, you will always manage to fit in your favourite TV programme or a trip to the pub or visiting facebook or putting in the extra hours to get that promotion etc. It may be as simple as you haven’t prioritized your time very well but generally, it is likely to be because you are not being authentic about why you haven’t done something.

I have been making the effort for a while now to not use the phrase “I didn’t have time” instead I will say “I didn’t make time” or “No, I didn’t I do it” or “I chose to do something else instead” or “I didn’t want to” all of these are authentic reasons for having not done something. It’s not easy though, being authentic often isn’t because it means you open up your true feelings on a subject, something we often prefer to hide, the simple phrase “I’m fine” is probably the absolute classic!

So your mission, if you choose to accept it, is next time you find yourself just about to say “I didn’t have time” a bit like the control issue in my ‘Pancake Day’ post, take a breath, step back and actually think about why you didn’t do it and then give the honest answer. I bet you shock the hell out of yourself, I know I do. Once the shock has passed, you will feel empowered and the chances are you will have highlighted something you may not have been aware of.

Good luck and please do let me know how it felt.